Convicts?::TweekCraig::
by sokkaluvr198
Summary: Tweek and Craig are blamed for a crime. Yaoi. Creek.
1. Chapter 1

If there was one thing that I was a mother-fucking God at, it was arguments.

Half my words were spoken by my middle finger, the other half by my mouth. And when that 100% showed it's vulgar beauty, I sent people to their grave during arguments. But sometimes -with one someone -I'd stick my hands in my pockets and pray for my mouth to speak PG-13. Because if it didn't, that Tweek would tweak so much I wouldn't be able to restrain myself from his jittery nature.

And that, would not make me fucking Craig Tucker.

–19 Days Earlier–

"No! No! Gah! J -j -just leave, Craig, not now -" Tweek whispered to me harshly, his shaking arms slowly pushing me out the door of his parents coffee shop.

"Fuck your parents." My comment received a shriek from Tweek as he suddenly exerted his energy into pushing me down the few steps up to the door. But having done so, he fell on top of my back quickly attempting to gain composure but somehow getting his fingers twisted in the string coming off of my hat.

"GAH! Oh no, my blood's gunna clog! Gah! I'm gunna die, Craig, I'm gunna die!" With no sign that I could hear Tweek's on-going nervousness and natural disasters caused by his finger getting loosely caught I untangled them, having been through this before. As soon as I had finished the untangling I took custody of his hand, turning around and finally being able to state what I had walked 12 blocks for.

"Go ice skating with me." Tweek twitched at my assertive voice, eyeing our hands anxiously.

"W -why? What if the ice breaks? It's only early December, Craig!" I smirked slightly, knowing I had won this battle.

"Then I'd catch you before you could even think you were going to fall, Tweek." I explained smoothly, forcing back a smirk itching to be scratched.

"I -I don't have any skates!"

"Done."

Still having custody of his hand, I dragged him to the corner of the street where a boy with ruffled brown hair sat comfortably, his back leaning against the pole. "Sup," Clyde said, instantly making Tweek twitch in nervousness.

"Got the skates?" Clyde nodded, taking a long drag off his cigarette before reaching to his side and picking up a black gym back. "Sweet." Taking the bag and lifting it onto my shoulder, I gave a swift grin to Tweek and pulled him past the Candy store -heading for Stark's Pond.

-

The walk there took us around thirty minutes, and by the time we arrived the sun drooped lazily, covered only slightly by gray clouds. Tweek didn't seem to notice this though, as if his lack of coffee was damaging his sense. I paid this no mind, though, and settled the bag down on a patch of snow. Letting go of Tweek's hand I unzipped it to stare coldly at three black gleaming guns. "What the fuck?"

Tweek, still out of it, was unaware of me as I picked up one and of the guns and held it in my hands. Where were the skates? And why had Clyde given me a bag of guns? I mulled it over for a moment, figuring it had something to do with his weekends. On his weekends he'd fly out somewhere and come back with the same black bag that was sitting on the snow in front of me.

But still...the guns were pretty cool. The slickness of the black, the cold metal holding so much power it was scary...

"AH! GUNS!" Tweek shouted, his brown eyes nearly popping out of his skull. "WE -WE -WE CAN'T BEEN SEEN WITH THESE! WE HAVE TO HIDE THEM! WE HAVE TO -" He stopped mid-sentence as the familiar ring of a cop car -no, at least two or three, was heard by us two. For a moment I felt as if I couldn't breathe, staring numbly at Tweek's vibrating person. But when three cop cars rounded the corner, heading down the long street towards us I sprang into action. Grasping Tweek's wrist I yanked him away from the bag and into a sprint down the sidewalk. I calculated in my head who's house we were closest to at the moment and groaned, knowing good and well that our chances of getting him to help us was slim to none.

Still, Tweek and I hauled ass.

We ran through an alley-way, turned right, and ran three more blocks. By the time we were standing on the doorstep the sirens were out of ears-reach. I gulped in short breaths as did Tweek, darkness settling over us. I took a couple more uneven breaths before reaching up and ringing the doorbell. "W -w -why are we here, Craig?" Tweek questioned me quietly, but I had no intentions to respond. Hell, I didn't even know why we were here.

Suddenly there was a click from the door and a sliver of light pouring over my face. I blinked a couple of times, adjusting to the light. "What do you want?" His voice sounded irritated and drowsy, but I didn't pay that any mind.

"Kyle, we need a place to stay." Kyle snorted slightly, opening the door more to reveal a glassy-eyed Kenny leaning heavily on his shoulder. I stared at Kenny, watched him as he grasped onto Kyle's jacket and breathed on his ear... "Dude, are you gay?"

"Guess we have that in common, Craig." Kyle said a impatiently. "But we're kind of busy -"

A loud siren erupted quietly from the distance, halting Kyle's words. "What the hell is that noise -are they after you two?"

"GAH! HE KNOWS!"

The sirens grew by the second, causing Craig to act irrationally. He gripped Tweek's vibrating hand and pushed back Kyle and Kenny, escaping into the Broflovski's house-hold. Making a dash for the stairs with Tweek safely following behind him, Craig heard the sound of the police cars stopping outside of the house. He paused abruptly at the top of the stairs, Tweek's head knocking into his back at the sudden pause. "What are you -" Craig quieted Tweek's frenzied voice by moving his hand over the blonde's mouth.

"What can I do for you, officer?" A sigh of relief flew threw Craig's lips -they were safe. Kyle was on their side.

"We're just gunna need to ask you a few questions -there's a murder case we're working on...mind if I come in?"


	2. Chapter 2

–19 Days Earlier–

A loud creak filled the silent house as the thin oak door closed. The patter of feet was heard as Kyle, Kenny, and the officer headed into the living room, which rested beside the stairs. The officer was still unaware of Tweek and I's presence. We sat scrunched near each other at the top of the stairs, shielded from view by a wall between the hallway and the stairs. Tweek was shaking violently, his brown eyes resembling the shape of a bug's, their stare like a bee's buzz that wouldn't go away. Attempting to ignore this, I listened to the conversation from downstairs.

"...We've been working on a murder case, boys, for a little over an hour. Not much information has been granted yet but we have a trail, yes, we have a trail..." The officer paused before changing the subject, "If you don't mind me asking...is your, um boyfriend okay?"

"He's not my -"

Kyle's sentence was caught short by a drunken giggle, Kenny's voice following short after, "Kiss me, Kyle ~"

"Kenny, get the fuck off me."

"No, I really don't mind if you two are -"

"No, officer, really. We're not -"

"We'd make some cute babies ~"

"Kenny! We're dudes!"

"Not like we haven't done it before -"

My eye twitched at their conversation, attempting to digest the information I had heard. They had...done it, before? "Who got murdered?" Kyle questioned out of the blue, causing me to frantically shut off my thoughts and listen.

"Candy shop owner, got shot in the head twice. Drugs were found in the candy -that could've been a possible reason why he was murdered...." The officers voice became quieter as he spoke, but a certain sense of pride filled it. I snarled in disgust, feeling as if this cop couldn't be any stupider. "Around 30 minutes ago we were reported about two boys standing near Stark's pond. One was holding a gun, and the other one was looking suspiciously nervous."

Tweek attempted to volt up, as if he was going to admit that he committed a crime he didn't do. Quickly though I snatched his t-shirt and pulled him down onto my lap, my hand clapping over his mouth once more and my eyes shooting daggers at Tweek.

"....what was that?" My heart felt out-of-control at the officer's voice, as if I was at a concert, my heart beating uncomfortably fast with the beat.

"Cats, sir, my family has cats." Kyle replied calmly in the silence of air. I heard a low 'meow' come from Kenny, but nothing else followed.

Finally the officer replied, "Cats? Hmm, okay then. As I was saying..." His voice trailed off into an incoherent whisper, forcing me to wait patiently for Kyle to comment. As I waited I took the time to look down at Tweek huddled in my arms, his mouth hidden by my pale hand. His eyes were still frantic, but were now aiming towards a door at the end of the hallway. It was open with the light coming from the room peaking out into the dark hallway, and immediately I recognized it as Kyle's room. I remember going in there before, when I was only ten and still held a sliver of innocence. Now, at the age of 17, it was like looking through an old photo album.

"It's Kyle's room," I said under my breath, earning me the amusement of watching Tweek quickly glance up at me and then back to the door repeatedly. I was so concentrated with this I almost didn't realize when Kyle spoke.

"I'm sorry we couldn't be any help, officer."

"It's alright, we'll catch those criminals. But from now on I'd be on the look-out for anything strange." The officers reply signified that he was leaving, and some of the tension left in Tweek's small body. No longer caring about the conversation, I stood up with Tweek as the front door snapped shut. Almost instantly I heard Kyle coming up the stairs. Rounding the corner I saw the annoyed face of Kyle, his thin dace over-flowing with aggravation. Kenny followed short behind him, gripping Kyle's hand, and looking as wasted as before.

"Did you guys fucking murder someone?" Kyle hollered.

"Hell, no." I stated calmly, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Then why did someone see you with guns?" The red head sounded impatient, as if he'd dealt with enough for one night. Not waiting for an answer he continued, "This involves Cartman doesn't it? That manipulating fat-ass -"

"It doesn't, we don't know what fucking happened." I said evenly, but on the inside I was pissed off. Now I was going to get some lecture about how fucked up Tweek and me were and how we shouldn't have ran in the first place.

"Why'd you come here then?" Taken aback by the question, I raised an eyebrow.

"Huh?"

"Why -did you -come -here?" Kyle used breaks between his words, as if slowing down the question for us.

"Because you live closest to Stark's Pond, and we were being chased by the effing police -" I was interjected by Kenny's drunken giggle, his cheeks burning a faint pink.

"Po-Po...!" At saying those words he broke into a fit of laughter, holding on to Kyle's arm for support. I snickered before reflecting Kyle's gaze, both of our eyes meeting.

"Look, my families on vacation in Canada right now. You can stay in Ike's room until they get back."


End file.
